Saturday, December 6, 2008

Thought you should know...

K, I'm normally terrified of chiropractors. (As in, totally, utterly, and completely freaked out in every way imaginable.) Crazy, I know, but it’s true. I think this irrational fear stems back to when I was a total insomniac in Jr. High. I seriously could. not. sleep. So, I watched a lot of television, and after I had burned through two full back-to-back episodes of “Star Trek: The Next Generation” (from 12:00 a.m. to 2:00 a.m. – I wasn’t kidding about the insomnia folks… and I’m not kidding about the Star Trek either. What? It was thoroughly entertaining! That Deanna Troy - what a head of hair... and Captain Picard, don't even get me started on that brilliant hunk of man.) I began to channel surf in search of additional insomniac fodder, when I stumbled upon this little gem: (mom, close your eyes ; )

How totally awesome are those shoulder pads? I know, right?


Yep. That’ right, Silk Stalkings (which my lil’ 13-year-old self was so NOT authorized to watch, by the way.) This particular episode involved some shady, smooth-talking, thug of a boyfriend snapping his unsuspecting girlfriend’s neck. I can still remember her bleach-blond hair and super-tight, hot-pink mini dress like it was yesterday. (Said dress was also accessorized to perfection with a wide, fluorescent blue, stretchy belt …it WAS 1993 after all.) She had totally assisted him in his criminal, thuggish dealings and everything, but in the end, it was a classic case of “she knew too much” -so the girl had to go. Watching the ease with which that white, blazer-wearing gangsta snapped that poor girl’s neck freaked me out, and I immediately thought of my chiropractor. In that moment I realized that one little slip at the chiropractor’s office could mean curtains for Lola. (Seriously, I was sure of it…and kind of still am…but only a little sure of it…and just sometimes.) A few years ago, I even screamed out loud (in terror) when a way too violent chiropractor adjusted my neck. Kyle laughed so hard, I thought he might pee himself, but at least he took my phobia a little more seriously from there on out…

But I do have a point, and here it is: I finally (about 2 years ago) found a chiropractor who doesn’t scare me nigh unto death when giving me an adjustment! Yaaaay! How great is that? His name is Dr. Antoine Harris and he has an office on state street in Orem (across from the Scera Pool) and next door to Wingers – which is fantastic because what could be better than a happy back and a pile of hot wings? Answer: nothing! …okay, childbirth, childbirth was definitely better, but besides childbirth (okay, AND Sound of Music Jigs at 8:30 in the a.m., Kyle, Kortland, hot baths, Cafe Rio, egg nog milkshakes, Irmita's tacos, snorkeling in Hawaii, laying in the grass with my dogs, and shopping) nothing! He is wonderful! He’s gentle and awesome, and here’s the best part: he helps out his non-insured, monetarily-challenged patients by giving them an awesome rate. Now, I had never given much thought to the wonderfulness of his rates before, but when I told one of my BFF’s (weesa) that he only charges $20.00 per visit, her jaw practically hit the floor… and I was just thinking, since Wees was surprised (and delighted) I thought all of you might be as well. -- Okay, really I just needed a vehicle to confess to my mom that I watched an episode…okay,fine, it was more like 5 episodes… of “Silk Stalkings” back in the day. MAN that has been weighing on me for years. (Sorry mom ;0) Phew, glad that’s off my chest.
And no... I'm not being paid or rewarded for posting this, I just thought, "Hey, we just had Thanksgiving and I realized that I was thankful for a chiropractor who manages to keep me out of pain without making me scream like a bad actress in a made for T.V. movie, that's all." He's a good guy, think of this as my Christmas gift to him: a ringing endorsement from a neurotic house-wifey, what could be better? (oh yeah, we already covered that, hot wings, my kid, Cafe' Rio and such...) I also just found out that he will give you 8 (count 'em e.i.g.h.t. adjustments) for $100 cash - that calculates out at 12.50 an adjustment. I just think that's crazy! So, I don't want to hear any "Why didn't you tell me!?!" from any of ya'll. You've been informed. Go forth and take the general health of your spine into your own hands! (He also gives insane rates for families - so if you know anyone with a bunch of kids, it would be well worth their while to check him out.)801.224.3661.
Again, mom, sorry about the "Silk Stalkings"...but hey, I guess if that's the worst I did (and I assure you, it is) then I guess you have something to be grateful for as well!

1 comment:

Janyece said...

Again, I'm rolling on the floor laughing! (Yeah, I just can't abbreviate it...)

Do you think this guy will throw in an airplane ticket as well? Now that would be a great Christmas present! I would totally see a scary chiropractor for that. Okay, maybe I'm not that desperate to get home... but almost!