Wednesday, June 9, 2010

mom-colored glasses.

When Kort is naughty and argues with me, and asks me "Why?" like, a million times in one day... I don't say to myself "Wow, he is NAUGHTY!" Do you want to know what I do? (Okay then, I'll tell you.) I simply slip on my mom-colored glasses and say to myself: "Isn't it wonderful that he's so inquisitive about the world around him?"
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And when he does something time-out worthy, and I tell him he is grounded to his room for an hour, and then he looks up at me with those big blue eyes and says "How 'bout 30 minutes?" I slip those glasses on and think to myself: "That boy is going to be one heck of a negotiator someday..."
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And when I say "No." to something, and he asks again-and-again-and-again-and-again, and then pleads his case further by presenting me with a numerical list of why "such and such an idea should seriously be considered" I don't think to myself "He is disrespecting my decision!" No, no, no, no. I put on my mom-colored glasses and say to myself: "That persistence is really gonna pay off someday. He just won't take no for an answer! This kid is going to be UNSTOPPABLE in the business world!"
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And, when he catches a fish, and then loves the gutting part a little more than I would like him to, and he excitedly holds the guts, and proudly shows me the little fishy heart, and then moves the dead fish's mouth (open/close/open/close) and pretends like the fish is talking in a high-pitched, cartoon-y voice, saying "No! No! Don't eat me...Nooooo! Don't cut off my head! OUCH! That hurts! Stop it!" and then proceeds to try and dig an eyeball out with his bare hands...
Do you want to know what I tell myself?
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No....not serial killer...
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Not puppeteer...(though that option is certainly a possibility...)
{PS. Is it just me, or does it look like that fish (above) is slow motion screaming "Nooooooo!"}
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Not "Wow, he's just a happy, fun-loving, sort-of-gross little boy."
(While that is the most likely option right there...
I prefer to skip right over it and go straight to...)
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World-Renowned SURGEON!
That's it!
{Obviously.}


Every mom should have a pair of mom-colored glasses.
Life is so much prettier with them.
Without them I think we'd just cry a lot.

6 comments:

Tezzie said...

LOL!!! Lola, you ROCK. Hilarious post...with just the right touch of Enlightening Mommy Advice. Hope Kort chooses the surgeon path...and the the serial killer one. That would suck. ;)

Natasha said...

thanks for joining us on our fishing adventure. it was super fun and man we have great BOYS...Boys will be Boys and thats why we LOVE EM

Serline said...

Is this how it works? When Narelle pulls open every drawer and cabinet and dumps stuff on the floor, I shouldn't scream, "Stop it! Naughty, naughty!" I should slip on my mom-colored glasses be thankful, "She is such an inquisitive and energetic angel!"

Grrrr... this is hard!

TerresaE said...

Great post. When my 15 1/2 year old son only hears the first 4 words out of my mouth, I try to slip on my mom-colored glasses, but still all I see is that he is truly becoming a man..... : )

Unknown said...

I wear my rose colored glasses EVERY flipping day Lola : ) Every flipping day. He does seem like a surgeon to me too!

LMS said...

AWWWW Laura, I love you so much. You still make me laugh!